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My Easy God is Gone*

The rising sun redeems me with the rolling waves warmed in its arms. A dog barks and I weep to be alive, a cat studies me and my joy is boundless. I lie on the grass and boy-like, search the sky. The clouds do not turn to angles, the winds do not whisper of heaven or hell. Perhaps I have no God--what does it matter? I have beauty and joy and transcending loneliness, I have the beginning of love--as beautiful as it is feeble--as free as it is human. I have the mountains that whisper secrets held before men could speak,  I have the ocean that belches life on the beach and caresses it in the sand,  I have a friend who smiles when he sees me, who weeps when he hears my pain, I have a future full of surprises, a present full of wonder. I have no past--the steps have disappeared the wind has blown them away. I stand in the Heavens and on Earth,  I feel the breeze in my hair.  I can drink to the North Star and shout on a bar stool, I can feel the teeth of a hangover, the joy of